CONFESSIONS OF A MODERN DAY HERMIT

"I don't want to be alone,

I want to be left alone."- Audrey Hepburn

I prefer to do my banking online.

I don’t answer my home phone.

I avoid going to the Post Office.

I Christmas shop on the internet.

I buy groceries in the early morning.

I still say "hello and see you later",

but I wave and always keep walking.

I like to prepare my coffee by myself.

I look for a seat by the window in the

Bagel Shop and I could do without the

Beyonce music blaring from speakers.

I’d rather not listen to the droning list of

Sports Center clichés on the flat screen

TV that’s suspended from the ceiling.

I take back roads, avoid highways,

go to dinner in the late afternoon.

I don’t want a table by old people,

babies, teens or families with kids.

I park at the back of the lot, far away

from the mess of cars that cruise rows

with blinkers in search of a front spot.

And when I come out of the stores,

each and every time, I find my Jeep

surrounded by trucks and other cars.

It’s a magnet that seems to attract

them or maybe it’s a well planned

conspiracy organized to make sure

my efforts to be left alone are in vain.